Weaponized incompetence

Short description: Behavioral phenomenon

Weaponized incompetence, also called strategic incompetence, is a concept in popular psychology related to an individual using feigned or deliberate incompetence to avoid unwanted responsibility.[1]

## Contents

* 1 In popular psychology
* 1.1 Gender and weaponized incompetence
* 1.2 Race and weaponized incompetence
* 2 In popular culture
* 3 See also
* 4 References

## In popular psychology

The term was coined by Jared Sandberg in a 2007 article for The Wall Street Journal , in which he described the phenomenon of strategic incompetence as one in which employees intentionally demonstrate a lack of competence in the workplace to avoid performing unwanted responsibilities. Once others begin to perceive the individual as incompetent, they stop delegating tasks to them. The article also discussed the behavior in interpersonal and romantic relationships.[2]

The concept has some similarities to the corporate concept of "expectations management", in which a customer's expectations are lowered to make it easier to satisfy them.[3]

It is often described as a form of manipulation.[4] The defining trait of weaponized incompetence is that it is deliberate. An individual will intentionally perform a task poorly and refuse to learn how to do so correctly, because they want someone else to see their incompetence and assume responsibility for the task.[5] Other individuals might agree to take on the responsibility out of frustration that they are not being performed well.[6]

### Gender and weaponized incompetence

Weaponized incompetence can be a symptom and cause of gender inequality in relationships and the workforce, as men avoid menial responsibilities which are then delegated to women. This can make it harder for women to advance in the workforce, as they are burdened with less prestigious but essential work while their male colleagues focus on tasks that boost their esteem and lead to promotions.[7][1]

Weaponized incompetence is sometimes used to explain the unequal division of labour in domestic relationships,[8][9] where one member of the household might employ incompetence to avoid domestic tasks such as housework or childrearing. In particular, it is used to describe situations where men feign or maintain incompetence in areas deemed "women's work," so that their female partners will perform the majority of domestic labor,[8][10] contributing to the "lazy husband" trope.[11] Strategic incompetence can also be used to avoid responsibility for organization, kinkeeping and social planning.[12][13]

This behavior is rooted in patriarchal expectations of women's roles as nurturers and organizers.[13] This can cause some women to take on the burden of additional domestic and emotional labor because their partners do not.[14] The unequitable division of labor can then create feelings of resentment or hostility between partners.[5][15]

### Race and weaponized incompetence

The concept has also been applied to racial disparities, in which racial minorities and women are expected to be more educated about and actively involved in addressing issues related to diversity and inclusion than their white counterparts.[16][17][18]

## In popular culture

Discussions about weaponized incompetence went viral on the social media platform TikTok in 2023.[19][20]

## See also

* Gaslighting
* Somebody else's problem
* Buck passing

## References

1. ↑ 1.0 1.1 "'Weaponized Incompetence' Screws Women Over At Work And In Relationships" (in en). 2022-01-26. https://www.huffpost.com/entry/weaponized-incompetence-women_l_61e71983e4b0d8b665717814.
2. ↑ Sandberg, Jared (2007-04-17). "The Art of Showing Pure Incompetence At an Unwanted Task" (in en-US). Wall Street Journal. ISSN 0099-9660. https://www.wsj.com/articles/SB117675628452071687.
3. ↑ Burkeman, Oliver (2008-01-19). "Strategic incompetence" (in en-GB). The Guardian. ISSN 0261-3077. https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2008/jan/19/healthandwellbeing.features1.
4. ↑ "People On TikTok Are Talking About This Common Form Of Gaslighting" (in en). 2021-10-20. https://www.bustle.com/wellness/weaponized-incompetence-manipulation-tactic.
5. ↑ 5.0 5.1 "What is weaponised incompetence and how do you call it out?" (in en-GB). 2023-05-15. https://www.cosmopolitan.com/uk/love-sex/relationships/a39489576/what-is-weaponised-incompetence/.
6. ↑ "What Is Weaponized Incompetence In A Relationship?" (in en-US). 2022-07-14. https://www.glam.com/928025/weaponized-incompetence-in-relationship/.
7. ↑ "It's time to talk about male mediocrity at work" (in en). https://fortune.com/2023/01/30/male-mediocrity-at-work-strategic-incompetence/.
8. ↑ 8.0 8.1 "Woman's grocery list for husband goes viral and sparks conversation about men's 'strategic incompetence'" (in en-US). https://www.usatoday.com/story/life/health-wellness/2021/09/15/men-weaponize-incompetence-avoid-housework-caring-kids/8336253002/.
9. ↑ "How Some Partners Try to Weaponize Incompetence | Psychology Today" (in en-US). https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/equipped/202301/a-case-of-weaponized-incompetence.
10. ↑ Laws, Chloe (2022-04-28). "Is your relationship suffering due to 'weaponized incompetence'? These are the toxic signs you need to look out for" (in en-GB). https://www.glamourmagazine.co.uk/article/weaponised-incompetence-meaning.
11. ↑ Abdou, Anouare. "What the Hell Is 'Weaponized Incompetence'?" (in en-us). https://www.askmen.com/dating/relationship_advice/understanding-the-toxicity-of-weaponized-incompetence.html.
12. ↑ Gale, Sammi (2023-03-29). "I'm a boyfriend who uses weaponised incompetence. Can I change?" (in en-GB). https://www.gq-magazine.co.uk/lifestyle/article/what-is-weaponised-incompetence-personal-essay.
13. ↑ 13.0 13.1 "How "weaponized incompetence" is killing marriages" (in en). 2022-03-20. https://www.salon.com/2022/03/20/how-mens-weaponized-incompetence-is-marriages/.
14. ↑ Strayed, Cheryl; Almond, Steve (2018-05-08). "Save Me From This Domestic Drudgery!" (in en-US). The New York Times. ISSN 0362-4331. https://www.nytimes.com/2018/05/08/style/household-parenting-marriage-share-work.html.
15. ↑ "Is 'Weaponized Incompetence' Part of Your Marriage?". https://goodmenproject.com/featured-content/is-weaponized-incompetence-part-of-your-marriage-kpkn/.
16. ↑ Murray, Jamie (2023-03-09). "Weaponized incompetence is destroying America" (in en-US). http://www.michigandaily.com/opinion/weaponized-incompetence-is-deeper-than-a-tiktok-trend/.
17. ↑ McCoy, Kimeko (2021-11-05). "'There are a lot of doors being closed': Confessions of a PR professional of color on toxic positivity and weaponized incompetence in DE&I" (in en-US). https://digiday.com/marketing/there-are-a-lot-of-doors-being-closed-confessions-of-a-pr-professional-of-color-on-toxic-positivity-and-weaponized-incompetence-in-dei/.
18. ↑ "Weaponized Incompetence: What It Is And How To Spot The Signs" (in en-US). 2023-05-22. https://www.women.com/1291385/high-achieving-employees-slacker-coworkers/.
19. ↑ Alban, Jack (2022-06-19). "'I guess I'll just have to do this next time': Woman calls attention to 'weaponized incompetence' by men in the workplace" (in en-US). https://www.dailydot.com/irl/weaponized-incompetence-workplace/.
20. ↑ Zhou, Maggie. "Why Is 'Weaponized Incompetence' Blowing Up On TikTok? Because Too Many Of Us Do It" (in en). https://www.refinery29.com/en-us/weaponized-incompetence-tiktok-trend.

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