Tantrum

A tantrum, temper tantrum, lash out, meltdown, fit or hissy fit is an emotional outburst,^[1][2][3] usually associated with those in emotional distress, that is typically characterized by stubbornness, crying, screaming, violence,^[4] defiance,^[5] angry ranting, a resistance to attempts at pacification, and, in some cases, hitting and other physically violent behavior. Physical control may be lost; the person may be unable to remain still; and even if the "goal" of the person is met, they may not be calmed. Throwing a temper tantrum can lead to a child getting detention or being suspended from school for older school age children, and can result in a timeout or grounding, complete with room or corner time, at home.^{[6][7][8][9][10][11]} A tantrum may be expressed in a tirade: a protracted, angry speech.^[6][7][12]

Tantrums are one of the most common forms of problematic behavior in young children but tend to decrease in frequency and intensity as the child gets older.^[13] For a toddler, tantrums can be considered as normal, and even as gauges of developing strength of character.^[14][15][16]

While tantrums are sometimes seen as a predictor of future anti-social behaviour,^[17] in another sense they are simply an age-appropriate sign of excessive frustration,^[18] and will diminish over time given a calm and consistent handling.^[19][20][21] Parental containment where a child cannot contain themself—rather than what the child is ostensibly demanding—may be what is really required.^[22]

Selma Fraiberg warned against "too much pressure or forceful methods of control from the outside" in child-rearing: "if we turn every instance of pants changing, treasure hunting, napping, puddle wading and garbage distribution into a governmental crisis we can easily bring on fierce defiance, tantrums, and all the fireworks of revolt in the nursery".^[23]

Some people who have developmental disorders such as Autism, ADHD, and intellectual disability^[24] or even a developmental disability, could be more vulnerable to tantrums than others, although anyone experiencing brain damage (temporary or permanent) can suffer from tantrums.^[25] Anyone may be prone to tantrums once in a while, regardless of gender or age.^[26][27] However, a meltdown due to sensory overload (which even neurotypical children can experience) is not the same as a temper tantrum.^[28]

Freud considered that the Wolf Man's development of temper tantrums was connected with his seduction by his sister: he became "discontented, irritable and violent, took offence on every possible occasion, and then flew into a rage and screamed like a savage".^[29] Freud linked the tantrums to an unconscious need for punishment driven by feelings of guilt^[30]—something which he thought could be generalised to many other cases of childhood tantrums.^[31][32]

Heinz Kohut contended that tantrums were rages of anger,^[33] caused by the thwarting of the infant's grandiose-exhibitionist core. The blow to the inflated self-image, when a child's wishes are (however justifiably) refused, creates fury because it strikes at the feeling of omnipotence.^[34]

Jealousy over the birth of a sibling, and resulting aggression, may also provoke negativistic tantrums, as the effort at controlling the feelings overloads the child's system of self-regulation.^[35][36]

Writer William Makepeace Thackeray claimed that in later life "you may tell a tantrum as far as you can see one, by the distressed and dissatisfied expression of its countenance—'Tantrumical', if we may term it so".^[37]

Heinz Kohut contended that "the baby’s core is likely to contain a self-centred, grandiose-exhibitionist part", and that "tantrums at being frustrated thus represent narcissistic rages"^[33] at the blow to the inflated self-image. With "a child confronted with some refusal ... regardless of its justifications, the refusal automatically provokes fury, since it offends his sense of omnipotence".^[34]

The willingness of the celebrity to throw tantrums whenever thwarted to the least degree^[38] is a kind of acquired situational narcissism^[39] or tantrumical behavior.

If tantrums are shown by older people, they might often be signs of immaturity or a mental or developmental disability; and often autistic or ADHD meltdowns are incorrectly labelled tantrums. It can also occur in neurotypical people under extreme stress.^[40]

• Acting out
• Running amok
• Philippic (tirade, orations)

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