Oreos

A cookie so devilish, it had a rainbow variant.

Some dare call it Conspiracy

What THEY don't want you to know!

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Sheeple wakers

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Oreos are a brand of cookie manufactured in the USA by Nabisco (a division of Mondēlez International (previously Kraft Foods). Normally, people would just think nothing of the cookie and cream snack; however, the Internet has found a way to link it to Satan himself.

History[edit]

The Oreo cookie was released by Nabisco in 1912 along with two other cookie lines. Nabisco released a cookie called "Mother Goose". Hoping to capitalize on the enduring success of its animal crackers, Mother Goose cookies were stamped into the shapes of characters from the aforementioned nursery rhyme. The other cookie line it released in 1912 was the Veronese cookie. The Veronese cookie was an ornate crisp. Both failed miserably while the Oreo went on to fame. Oreos are actually a ripoff of another cookie called "Hydrox" that was released four years earlier, but it managed to become much more popular to the point that many assume Hydrox is the ripoff.^[1]

Origin of the name[edit]

The origin of the name "Oreo" is a bit clouded. Several explanations have been offered. Oreos were originally packaged in a gold-colored tin so it's possible Oreo comes from the French word for "gold" which is or. Others make a connection with the Greek word for mountain which is actually oros. It's been said that earlier test versions of the cookie resembled little mountains. The final theory is it's a made-up word. The word was constructed a) because it sounds so nice to say b) it comes from the "re" in "cream" which is then sandwiched between two O-shaped biscuits. Hence O-re-O.

Satanic Templar Conspiracy[edit]

Normally you just eat your cookies. You don't spend a lot of time actually looking at your cookies. However, some people have taken a hot moment to look at their Oreos and noticed a small double cross symbol on the cookie just above the word "OREO". This cross is known as the Cross of Lorraine, a variant of the Latin (Christian) cross used by the Knights Templar. You'll find it as part of Nabisco's corporate logo itself. Nabisco chose the symbol believing it was understood in Europe as a symbol for quality.^[2] Conspiracy cranks who see Templar machinations behind every door and in every cookie aisle claim the symbol is really a Templar cross,^[3] which was later then adopted by Satanist Anton LaVey and modified as the Leviathan Cross or Satan's Cross.

Those who have seen through the looking glass and understand the true Knights Templar tie-in also understand the actual origin of the name. See, Oreo is a portmanteau of the Hebrew word Or which means "light" and the Greek word Eo which also means "light". See this is a super illuminated cookie. And you know what that implies!

Blogger Jason Colavito traced the origin of this conspiracy theory to a 2004 post on Above Top Secret message board.^[4]

How to avoid consuming Satanic Templar Snacks[edit]

Oreos in Canada are made by Christie Cookie and do not employ the Satanic Templar logo in the cookie's design. Stock up on your next passion-filled visit to Canada and sleep well at night.

References[edit]